Saturday, October 7, 2006

the sunny outlook of our sparkly new chair

From Friday's Faculty Meeting

Chair: The Dean's Office is considering making a call for minority recruitment hires, so we should spend some time thinking about folks we'd like to consider.

Faculty Member Who's in the Know: Actually, the Provost's Office said they're not likely to approve any funding for that this year.

Chair: Well, right. Like I said, the Dean's Office is considering it.

FMWitK: But the Provost's Office won't likely approve it.

Chair: You and I are saying the same thing.

FMWitK: I . . . . You're . . . . We're . . . . Uh, yes. We're saying the same thing.

[FMWitK is our only faculty person of color. She is accutely aware of the rhetorical stylings of the Dean's and Provost's Offices. We will not be afforded recruitment hires this year, despite our white male chair's optimism. Bless his heart.]

*****************

Chair: As you know, our main budget request for this year was the increase in GTA stipends. Aaannd, the Budget is now in. Aaaannnd, we didn't get the increase.

Faculty and One Graduate Student Representative: YOUHAVETOBEKIDDINGMENOFUCKINGWAYUNBELIEVEABLETHISISSUCHBULLSHIT
WHODOWEHAVETOFUCK?

Chair: I KNOW. I KNOW. And remember what our external reviewers wrote about our GTA stipend two years ago? How it is "pathetic" and "pitiful"? That report is the joke of the Dean's Office.

F&OGSR: YOUHAVETOBEKIDDINGMENOFUCKINGWAYUNBELIEVEABLETHISISSUCHBULLSHIT
WHOCANIFUCKUP?

Chair: I know. I know. We'll just have to try again next year.

[Our GTAs make less than $10,000 a year. They're not the lowest paid GTAs in our R1 university. But no matter! Our department has 900 majors and 16 faculty members. Our GTAs teach the vast majority of our curricula. We've been asking for a higher stipend for almost 10 years. Our new Chair seems to think that this simply can't go on for much longer. Bless his heart.]

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